You Can’t Selectively Numb
Numbing is something many of us learned long before we could name it.
When we grew up in environments where our emotions were too much, too loud, or too inconvenient, our nervous system adapted. It learned to protect us by shutting down. We stopped crying, stopped expressing, stopped feeling too deeply - because it felt safer not to feel at all.
Numbing can take many forms:
Overworking. Overthinking. Scrolling. Staying “busy.” Trying to fix others. Avoiding stillness.
We numb with substances, all kind of distractions. Sex. Media. Shopping.
We run away from feeling. We don’t stay present. We avoid looking at ourselves and to each other.
It’s not weakness - it’s protection. A way your body and mind found to survive emotional overwhelm.
But what happens is: when we numb pain, we also numb joy.
When we silence grief, we silence love.
When we avoid sadness, we avoid the depth of connection that makes life meaningful.
We disconnect. Withdraw. We shut down, our feelings, our voices.
We feel empty. We don’t know what to feel our body or how to name what we feel.
And that’s how we walk like lifeless beings avoiding pain but also avoiding to feel that connection we all crave for.
As we heal, we learn that emotions are not the enemy - they are messengers.
They carry the wisdom of unmet needs, unspoken truths, and unlived parts of us.
Healing doesn’t mean we never feel pain again.
It means we become safe enough within ourselves to feel everything - without collapsing or running away.
Healthy coping doesn’t look like perfection or endless positivity. It looks like Presence.
It looks like:
– Taking a pause instead of shutting down.
– Moving your body when emotions feel too big to hold.
– Reaching out for support instead of isolating.
– Breathing, grounding, crying, creating.
– Letting yourself be human - fully, softly, and without shame.
Because to truly live, you must allow yourself to feel.
May you remember:
Your emotions are not the problem.
They are the path Home! The path to yourself and to other’s hearts.
With love,
Aniela🤍
www.MindfulTherapist.us
🤍 Sessions online.
🤍 Office: THE BOX, 425 Boardman Ave, Traverse city, MI
“The place where people bloom.”
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